My Real Problem With Chick-fil-A and Dan Cathy

The Chick-fil-A controversy is NOT about first amendment rights. I don't care what Dan Cathy THINKS. I care what he DOES with the millions and millions of dollars (five plus I believe) he's made with his company, and who he gives them to. Groups like Focus on Family, and Exodus International. These organizations actively support laws allowing people and institutions to discriminate against some of our neighbors, children, friends, teachers, doctors, and family. Not just here, but internationally, in countries where homosexuality is a crime, punishable by death. This is not some guy on a corner with a sign and a megaphone. This is a significant force that has the power to adversely change millions of people's lives.

Some people say his company doesn't actively promote discrimination, it's just his opinion, so what? I say if selling people a product, then taking some of the profits from that product to give to organizations that will fund attempts to make it legal for you to actively discriminate against your gay employees (and people who want to have access to birth control, or limitless other options to deny services to someone based on "moral grounds") isn't actively promoting discrimination, I don't know what is.

How do you think the gay Chick-fil-A employees (and I guarantee there are some) feel now? When they saw the restaurants fill up with people supporting "traditional Christian values" that meant denying them rights that the customers themselves had without question? When they saw the Twitterverse flood with seemingly corporate justified and supported hate speech such as "if you see any fags kissing outside of Chick-fil-A, please feel free to hit them with your car!" and "woo-hoo! No more fags allowed in Chick-fil-A!" do you think that made them feel welcome? Do you think any closeted gay employees will be coming out any time soon while they still work there?

If Bill Gates told everyone tomorrow he was taking profits from Microsoft and supporting fundamentalist Islamists who in turn relegate women to the status of cattle everywhere they can, I bet you'd be pissed you'd went with the PC over MAC. 

The 10 Commandments of Walmart

 
I wrote this last night when someone started a thread with this title, but it had lame things like "thou shalt wear a bra" and "thou shalt not eat grapes you haven't paid for." I thought I could to a little better and got carried away. 

1. Thou shalt have no other Gods above the Almighty Walmart. Never shall you pay homage to the likeness of Amazon or Internet. Nay shall you likewise cross the threshold of remaining local merchants for they are of the devil and will lead you astray with temptations of “quality,”  “selection” and promises of “fair trade.” Thou shalt be forsaken and cast out upon the lands and denied the glory of death by trampling on the most Holiest of Holy days, Black Friday.

2. Thou shalt not place graven images or likenesses of people or languages to which thou dost not understand upon intimate parts of thy flesh and display such sins against the LORD with “low rise pants,” “wife beaters,” and “belly shirts,” especially when thy personage is akin to that of a well fed oxen.

3. Thou shalt not take the LORD’s name in vain, nor shalt thy take in vain the names of his lesser known favored companions, his dogs Damn, Shit, Fuck, and Elmo, his beloved cats Pussy and Cunt, his forsaken and slightly retarded brother Barney, and his rooster Cock and his ass, Ass. Nay shall ye say these names aloud or have them printed on thy garments or flesh visible within the hallowed grounds of Walmart. Nay shall ye display any part of these items upon your person at any time in public, ever.

4. Remember the Sabbath, and every other day of the year are opportunities to show the LORD Walmart your love of him by exchanging coin, or your first born son,  for tokens to place upon your altar/mantle such as a “plasma screen tv” or a “personalized You’re  #1! beer stein.” This will show your true devotion to His word, and His word is “Consumerism.” Amen.

5. Honour thy Mother and Father by obeying them in all they command of you and thou shalt not run shrieking as if thou art crap-flinging monkeys throughout all the lands. Breaking this commandment shall result in stoning or caning as seen fit by all who bear witness.

6. Thou shalt not kill other’s faith in humanity by dressing in garments of the whitest of refuse, failing to cleanse thyself most thoroughly, partaking of that which has not been duly paid for, exposing mounds of sinful flesh, or speaking in tongues into a tell-if-own while ignoring all those who seek to give you aid.

7. Thou shalt not commit adultery, or attempt to begat any decedents, or take thyself in hand and spill one’s seed upon the holy ground of Walmart. To do so will result in instant death by stoning or removal of offending body parts by all who were cursed to have witnessed.

8. Thou shalt not steal neither a motorized scooter nor a space to park thine camel thus designated for the crippled and infirm merely because thou art lazy and overly abundant in thine hindquarters.

9. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thine own begotten son or daughter by calling them names such as “stupid” “brat” or “thief” when in truth they are merely following the example set forth unto them by their forefathers. The Lord doth command thee to get thine shite together and parent thy offspring appropriately.

   

10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s young daughter’s garments and attempt to place your huge tracks of land within its tiny confines. To do so is the most gravest of sins in His Father’s eyes, and the LORD shalt smite you most heartily.

Toddler Solo Mile High Club

(I thought this got deleted when Kat hit the power button on my PC, just found the draft version, yea!)

So I have joined the Toddler Solo Mile High Club... meaning that I've successfully flown with a toddler by myself, and learned to tell the tale. We've flown with Kat a few times before, to Hawaii and Utah, but flying back from LA was the first time I had to do it sans her (very helpful) Dad. I've now got a new arsenal of tricks up my sleeve and before I am buried under a pile of dirty vacation laundry, I thought I'd share them so people who are often asking me for suggestions will know what helped me.

Your Kid as a Hip Accessory- I wear Kat in a carrier and use her stroller as a luggage cart (which you can't take through security) to wrangle all the extra stuff. Bonus is that you can smuggle in an extra (small) bag under it if needed, make it a shopping bag and they won't question it thinking you bought it at the Airport. Bring a bag to stuff the stroller in to check it (for free!) at the gate if you don't want it getting filthy. You can also stuff your coats in it. You need to get a tag before boarding from the gate attendant.


Be Very Organized- Very important. Cut your diaper bag down to the minimum, but also make sure you have that extra outfit, diaper, special toy, burp rag. You don't need the sunscreen, hat, etc so ditch it. The second you sit down, get out the essentials... inflate your pillow (half way, it will expand at altitude), stuff the pocket with iPad, burp rag, toy, snack, bottle, book, attach the Flye Baby (see below), take off shoes and stash things you don't want to lose or have played with (earrings, socks, pens). Wipe down all surfaces you'll be touching (arm rests, tray table, buttons, etc) with sanitizing wipes. I'm not a germ-a-phobe, but a veteran traveler suggests this as a good way to avoid getting sick. The air is filtered and cleaned, the plane itself is not (same goes with the bathroom in the airport and on the plane, they are filthy!).

Pimp Out Your Kid- Seriously. Dress your kid in extra cute (but comfortable) clothing. People love to help/hold/amuse/do favors for an especially cute kid. Bamboo fabrics are fantastic for breathing and avoiding heat rashes. Load up on the diaper rash creme and change into a fresh diaper right before boarding.

Get There Early!- Ask the gate attendant if there is an extra seat and if you could be reassigned to the row that has it. Being able to set your kid down in it (without purchasing one) is a luxury you should take advantage of if you can. An aisle seat is nice for getting up and down a lot, however you run the risk of having your kid's head be bumped and bashed (or in my case, a big, heavy metal can falling out of the overhead onto it) by people and carts in the aisle. Watch those carts, they can catch little legs and arms easily.

Cool Kids Ride In the Back- Riding at the back of the plane has several advantages... you're closer to the bathroom so when the seat belt sign goes off you can get there first. You are closer to the flight attendants who love to hold cute babies while you pee/change/eat/stretch/wrangle stuff. There is a galley area they can stretch their legs in when the Flight Attendants are working (keep a close eye, they have the ability to deploy the emergency slide quicker than the person who invented the thing. It's one of nature's mysteries.) You have plenty of time to get your stuff together while everyone else is deplaning. When you get to baggage, your stuff will most likely already be out. You have less people to worry about upsetting if you're not in the middle of the plane. Be aware that the last row does NOT recline, so this could be a problem for long flights.

Losers Ride In the Front- You might get a little bit extra leg room, but you can't keep anything by your feet, and you have no easy access pocket in front of you to stash snacks/bottle/toys/blankets. There are no more bassinets either... planes are being retrofitted with airbags there so they are being phased out.

Bathrooms Are Fun!- Be aware that usually only one bathroom has a changing table, it says on the door, choose wisely. A bathroom can be a great diversion for a fidgety kid (I'd wipe it down quick with gel/wipes first, they are usually one of the most dirty bathrooms out there). Kat spent a good 15+ minutes pulling out all of the tissues and then stuffing them back in, and then pulling them out and tearing them up, and then stuffing all the pieces back in again (I saved a stack of unmolested ones to put back in when we left). The mirror is also great fun to play with as well. Just make sure to take a peek out every few minutes to make sure some desperate Mom with a dreaded #3 isn't waiting for you!

Baby Bling- I wore a super sparkly fun "Statement Necklace" and it was great for her to play with while sitting in my lap and in the front carrier. There are ones good for teething as well (Chewbeads) if yours is of that age. It kept her distracted and happy.

GET A FLYE BABY-I will be really sad when I can't get Kat to sit in this any more. It's a hammock like device that attaches to the tray table and buckles around your waist. It's best for infants, but I bring the padded head rest from her stroller so that she doesn't bonk her head on the tray table and it works for getting her out of my lap and feeding, watching a video, playing a game and the like. Bonus is that it works as a way to strap your kid to a chair as an emergency high chair of sorts as well when they're older.

Wear Your Hooter Hider- Even if you're not breastfeeding, it's great for shielding little eyes for naps, it's a blanket that can't be thrown on the floor, has pockets to stash supplies for diaper changing in the tiny bathrooms, and serves as a bib to keep you relatively clean. The Mom and Dad who were thrown up on by their kid during my recent flight both wish they had one I'm sure! We almost had a reenactment of the Pie Eating Contest scene from Stand By Me. They had to call in a special cleaning crew. Yuck.

Worst Case Scenario Packing- In your carry on, pack only the things that you couldn't live without at your destination or on board if you're stuck on the runway for an extra four hours... breast pump, change of clothes (for all family members, see previous mention of explosive vomiting kid), extra diapers, that obnoxious toy your kid loves for emergencies, snacks, formula, valuables, first aid meds, charging cords.

You Need These- Rubberized twist ties. Seriously, I use them everywhere. They will hold toys/sippy cups/pacifiers/ from falling (being thrown) on the floor, bags on your stroller handle... and they are cheap and fit in your bag easily.

Inflatable Pillows- I bring a couple, one for my back, another for my neck or arm so that I can hold a sleeping toddler without needing chiropractic work the next day.

Variety of Treats- I use one of those four portion formula dispensing things (just upgraded to this for bigger sized treats) for keeping treats in. Bonus is that it kept her busy for a good 20+ minutes working on getting food out of the little hole. I'm really tempted to get something like this too.  Of course it's not like I'll fill it with dog treats, at least not the cheap kinds with fillers. Sheesh.

Baby Head Phones- I got a pair of earmuffs at Brookestone that have headphones in them for taking on your phone that work great, or you can spend the $30 at the Airport store for specialty kid's ones when you lose them like I did. They work great for white noise, music, or videos for your kid... if they'll keep them on.

Finally- Your sippy cup may turn into an explosive device at altitude. Be careful when you open it as it may spray everywhere. The guy sitting in front of us found this out the hard way when it sprayed the ceiling over his head and dripped down on him right as I was talking to Brooke about breastfeeding Kat... you could tell by his instant reaction that he just KNEW he'd been sprayed with breast milk. Whoops! Your bottle of hand sanitizer might explode/leak as well, so be warned.

I could go on, but those are my tips and tricks that I haven't seen listed ad nauseum on other parenting sites. Above all, be patient and realize it's (usually) not as bad as people will lead you to believe, everyone is NOT giving you the evil eye, and strangers will offer to help you when you most need it. Oh, and a little bribe of chocolates and ear plugs for those around you and the flight attendants wouldn't be a bad idea either!


(I have a bunch of photos to add but lack the time to edit and post them now. Check back later to see if I became motivated enough to do it!)

National BBQ (Memorial) Day

I am grateful that Memorial Day is more about BBQing than mourning for me. My Father and Grandfather were both in the military, but both came back just fine long before I was born. I have no close friends or family in the military now, and have never lost someone to war. In fact, military service and sacrifice is more of a theoretical concept to me. I am grateful for that because being a service member or family member of one seems like it would be really, really hard.

I am grateful that we as a Nation, and for generations, have no real concept of what it's like to be IN a war, as in LIVING on the front lines, aside from our Service Men and Women. Not like people in Germany, Japan, Vietnam, Afghanistan, Iraq, Somali... Sure, our Grandmothers rationed sugar and built airplanes and kids hid under desks during drills, and I don't mean to belittle that very real effort and fear... but we, as a Nation, haven't lived in bombed out cities, our infrastructure shattered, scrounging for basic supplies since, what, the Civil War in 1865? How lucky are we to have escaped the kind of terror, destruction and heartache that our Veterans have witnessed?

The closest we've come in the last 147 years to this would be the tragedy of 9/11. I visited Ground Zero when Brooke and I went to New York a few years ago. I am grateful that I had a chance to visit. You should too. Could you imagine holes like that all over your city? This week, that building shelled, next week, this neighborhood. I am grateful for the perspective that gave me. I am grateful that was in New York, and not Seattle, or L.A. where most of my loved ones are.

When I see reports about religious extremists in other countries, I am grateful that our current biggest debate here is who should pay for birth control, not that; should it even exist, should women be allowed to drive to get it, should women who seek it be punished or killed by beating or stoning, should women be forced to undergo "purity tests" before being forced into an arrange marriage at age 12 to a 38 year old man... and so, so many other things that we are so blessed to be free of here. I am grateful my daughter will not ever have to worry about any of those things. I am grateful that we have people who are so dedicated to our country and the idea of freedom that we have to share with the world that they are out there, VOLUNTARILY, every day, trying to banish the oppression and fear and someday make their biggest debate be who should pay for birth control for the free and valued women of their society.

So I fly my flag, post a poignant photo on Facebook, and say I'm grateful for our Veteran's and Service Men and Woman's sacrifice... but I'm mostly grateful that they are braver and more dedicated than I am to our country's vision of freedom and democracy for all by serving in our Military so that I and my child (and her children as well) will hopefully never really understand what Memorial Day is about for them.

Firsts of Many

Upon having my daughter, I became obsessed with documenting her "firsts." Her first bath, first smile, first nap in my arms... I try to capture all her notable firsts, either in photos or my journal. It's gotten me thinking though, why does it seem so important? Why this general obsession among parents to mark these milestones of first foods, steps, words, hugs, smiles, nursing, naps, and more? I think it's because the first time is often a momentous occasion met with cheers, photos, and/or excited phone calls. "Lasts" however, often happen quietly, with no fanfare and no recognition of their importance at all.

I doubt I'll know at the time the last time I nurse my daughter, and the last time she falls asleep all milk drunk in my arms. The last time she does that gasping, excited baby laugh when she sees her daddy or an animal will also likely not be noticed. The last time she gives up the fight and falls asleep spread eagled in her play room will likely be marked with amusement, but little else. Similarly the last diaper I change, though certainly worthy of celebration, will probably not be properly celebrated until the diaper itself is long gone. The last time she fits in my baby sling may be rejoiced by my aching back and shoulders, but not by my heart. The last time I have a let down at the sound of a baby crying will likely also only be looked back on with bittersweet memories, if I remember it at all. The last time she needs me to help her eat from a spoon, soothe her after a nightmare, answer yet another "why?" question, carry her to bed asleep, read her a bed time story, wash her hair for her, take a bath together, and so many, many other small and large steps towards independence will all only likely be recognized as the last time well after the fact.

So... thanks largely to the wonders of modern technology, I'm doing my best to document those important (and not so important) firsts. Those I can generally notice and keep track of, although I will admit, sometimes I can go a bit too far. Some of those "firsts" are only something a mother can truly love and appreciate.

Kat's First Solid Baby Turd. She's Going To Hate Me For This One.

My Current Book Lusts... Truth is Stranger Than Fiction

Most of my friends who are going to have kids, already have at least one, but there are a few stragglers out there who might benefit from my unfettered addiction to buying books pertaining to whatever topic I happen to be currently passionate about, which right now is of course baby related. Oh, and baking, but that's another post. So, here are my Top 10 Baby Books that pretty much cover the range of everything you need to know (and then some) about what you've really gotten yourself into. Good luck!


If You Only Buy One Pregnancy/Baby Book: "Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn- the Complete Guide" by Penny Simkin, Janet Whalley and Ann Keppler. Very comprehensive and accessible book that's not full of fear mongering and tells you everything you need to know without needlessly freaking you out. Unlike "What to Expect When You're Expecting" which is condescending and full of info that will cause many pending Moms to lose much needed sleep and bombard their health care providers with panic-induced questions and phone calls. My friends who are OB/GYNs have asked me to ask you to not read that book.  Or to take any advice from strangers on an on-line forum or phone app. Thank you.

If You Are Lazy and/or Buying a Baby Book for the Dad: "Baby 411" by Denise Fields and Ari Brown, M.D. This was given to us by my husband's cousin who is a new mom and an OB/GYN. Great quick reference guide, easy read, great question and answer format. Good guy book, only thing that would make it better is if it had cartoons and was scented with bacon.

If You Have Any Concerns About Your Relationship With Your Partner Post Baby: "And Baby Makes Three" by John M. Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman. A comprehensive strategy for making sure you stay connected with your partner and how to rekindle romance post baby arrival. I've worked with the Gottman's and have been a fan of their science-based approach to relationships and communication for years. There is a course offered by many hospitals called Bringing Baby Home based on this book. Also a valuable tool. They say 65% of couples experience serious decline in their marital happiness once the baby is born, this book will help you to be prepared in case that's you.

If You Have No Concerns About Your Relationship With Your Partner Post Baby: You should still read "And Baby Makes Three" because you never know and it's best to have these tools to use just in case. I feel we've been in the 35% of still happy couples (that's largely due to luck and having a baby who eats, sleeps, and poops without too much of a mess, screaming fit, or health problems), but the info in this book is still very helpful and has done a lot to keep us sane and happy and talking to each other without clenched jaws or wanting to chuck a dirty diaper at their head.

If You Have (or Need) a Sense of Humor About It All: "The Three-Martini Playdate- A Practial Guide to Happy Parenting" by Christie Mellor. While much should be taken very tongue-in-cheek, (such as "Our Little Tot's First Martini Recipe"), most of it is really a much needed rational breath of fresh air (such as "a child who has never been given chores to do is a child who grows up with a skewed sense of entitlement.). See also her follow up hit- "The Three-Martini Family Vacation: A Field Guide to Intrepid Parenting."

If You Are Already Placing Bottles of Purelle Around the House and Locks on Toilet Lids in Your First Trimester: "How to Have Your Second Child First- 100 Things That Are Good to Know... the First Time Around" by Kerry Colburn & Rob Sorensen. Sit down, have a glass of wine (Gasp! Yes, really, you can do it while pregnant), and read this book with your partner. It's hard to pick a favorite tip... from "you don't have to interact with your baby ALL of the time" to "let your partner do it their way" this book is full of good advice and good reminders for all parents, high strung and not. If you are already making spread sheets and think a baby helmet is a good idea for general around-the-house attire, you should be required by law to read this. For your child's well-being as well as your own and that of everyone around you.

If You Will Be Having a Baby, Ever, and Have Boobs: "Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding" by Ina May Gaskin. I actually haven't read this book, but it has been highly recommended by many friends who have struggled with issues with breastfeeding, I just went directly to a lactation consultant as I was too tired to read a book when I started having problems on day 11. I can't say enough good things about breastfeeding, even after dealing with "rug burned nipples" and latch problems, it's hands down the most special time I spend with my daughter. Oh, and just so you know, even if you don't breastfeed, the term "perky" will still never describe your boobs again without surgery. The good news is no one but you and your husband will know, and after not being allowed near them for awhile he won't care, he'll just be happy to have access again. Good excuse to buy that La Perla bra you've always wanted!

If You Are Not Obnoxiously Rich: "Baby Bargains" is for you. By the same people who do "Baby 411" (also "Expecting 411" and "Toddler 411"), I believe they have a guarantee to save you at least $250 or your money back. Full of very useful advice on what you really need, and what is just preying on new parents fears crap (hint: a wipe warmer is something every child can survive just fine without). Start with this book and by chucking the Baby's R Us "must have" registry list and you'll be good to go.

If You Won't be Having a Full Time Nanny: "Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp. The "Five S's" on how to soothe a crying baby saved our sanity during the first few months. It's worth it just for that. There is also a DVD if you're all read out. Great for Dad to watch, will help him feel so much more empowered to deal with their tiny crying offspring. Men really like to be able to "fix" things, and this book/DVD helps them do that.

If You Have No Idea What to Do With Your Baby Aside From Singing Obnoxious Songs and Dressing Them in Cute Things: "Baby Smarts" by Jackie Silberg. A short little book with easy references to let you know what physical and cognitive skills your child is developing and what you can do to encourage them. It's really quite facinating to see how they figure stuff out when you know what to look for. Also helps you to be less anxious and frustrated with a cranky or crying baby when you know they're just working hard at figuring something out, and not colic or just being a general, undiagnosed pain in the ass.

BONUS: If You're a Science Nerd Like Me and/or Think It's Never to Early to Start Prepping for Harvard: "Brain Rules For Baby" by Dr. John Medina. It's a very interesting read on how a baby's brain develops and what their cognitive skills are like at each age. A good read, not too dry or scientific as to be inaccessible for weary parents to be. Amusing stories illustrate various developmental steps and keep it entertaining... my 92 year old Grandfather picked it up to read while he was visiting and enjoyed it when he wasn't watching Jeopardy.

A Horse is a Horse, Of Course.

I think a lot of us wondered what it would be like to be a parent. I know I sure did, especially during the times when I wasn’t so sure I wanted to be one. How could I be sure that it would be worth it? There’s no legal/socially acceptable way to back out of it if it doesn’t work out for you. Now that I am a parent, I think I’ve figured out a way to describe it and maybe help those without kids to understand what all the hoopla is about.

If you’ve been lucky, you may have had a pet or an encounter with an animal that you were able to form a special bond with. I’m not talking guinea pig or garter snake found in the yard here. Something a bit higher on the IQ scale. Perhaps it was a pet dog that you raised from a puppy, or a wild deer that you got to eat out of your hand. For me it was a horse named Turk.

I was working on a film that was shooting on a small suburban farm one day. There were two horses in a barn next to where we were filming that needed to be calmed down as they were freaking out. One was an ancient, sway backed nag, the other a young and antsy stallion. I was dubbed horse wrangler for the day after getting the nag to calm down by stroking and talking to her. One of the farm hands showed up and took over for her so I moved over to Turk. He was a bit high strung and mouthy. Not to mention big. I have a bit of experience around horses, but was not by any means comfortable around unknown energetic animals who liked to nibble on you. Yet for some reason, Turk and I clicked.

Turk stood in his stall with his head out as he and the nag had to be able to see each other in order to stay calm. I stood in front facing him with his head over my shoulder, stroking his neck and scratching his ears for several hours. Not often do you get the chance to just be a source of comfort for an animal like that without asking anything in return. No grooming, no saddling, no riding. Just talking, stroking, soothing.

At one point my arms got tired and someone needed to talk to me so I turned around, with Turk’s head still over my shoulder. He apparently got miffed that I’d stopped paying attention to him and nipped my shoulder. I promptly turned around and grabbed his bottom lip and let him know in no uncertain terms that was not OK. I then turned back to continue my conversation. He started nuzzling my shoulder, kind of hard, almost but not quite nibbling. It actually felt pretty good as my shoulders were sore from holding my arms over my head for the last several hours. Jokingly, I leaned into it and told him that felt good, and then I pointed to my other shoulder and asked if he could get that side as well. Amazingly enough, he did! Where ever I pointed to, he would nuzzle/nibble/massage! The person I was talking to when this happened couldn’t believe it! What an unexpected way to be repaid for all the stroking and scratching I’d been doing for him.

At one point I had to leave to run some errands and wasn’t expecting to make it back by the time we wrapped, and since it was the last day there I wouldn’t see Turk anymore, which made me rather sad. Well, as luck would have it I was needed back on set so I cut my errands short and returned. One of the reasons they needed me back was because Turk was being feisty and wouldn’t calm down for anyone else. They said he got upset as soon as I left and calmed down as soon as he saw me again. He was whinnying as I approached and started nuzzling me as I scratched his ears. I was so touched, everyone likes to feel needed, even if it was by a horse I’d just met.

Making a connection with an animal like that, one that is intelligent and capable of showing affection and had a distinct personality, was an amazing and awesome feeling. To be needed by another creature for comfort and affection in a way that no one else seemed able to give, it’s a lot like what it feels like to be a mom. My daughter is this little creature who is still a mystery to me in many ways because of how much she is changing every day. While she is great with other people and is a pretty calm and mellow baby the vast majority of the time, sometimes she is just fussy or upset, and it seems I’m the only one who can calm her. When she nuzzles into my neck as I rock her to sleep, it makes my day because I know I am the only person on earth who can fulfill her specific needs at that moment, and I'm doing it well! Don’t get me wrong, her Dad is fantastic and will no doubt fulfill needs that I can’t as she gets older and has more of them (like indulge her "need" for a Porsche or her "need" to go camping with her boyfriend). But for now, when I go to pick her up and her face lights up and her arms and legs go crazy waving around and her cries stop immediately, I know that it’s me, and no other, who can calm and comfort her best right now. That equally awesome feeling and responsibility is what makes everything else, the erratic sleep, the body changes, the loss of some personal freedom, even the disgusting diaper explosions… so very worth it.