Firsts of Many

Upon having my daughter, I became obsessed with documenting her "firsts." Her first bath, first smile, first nap in my arms... I try to capture all her notable firsts, either in photos or my journal. It's gotten me thinking though, why does it seem so important? Why this general obsession among parents to mark these milestones of first foods, steps, words, hugs, smiles, nursing, naps, and more? I think it's because the first time is often a momentous occasion met with cheers, photos, and/or excited phone calls. "Lasts" however, often happen quietly, with no fanfare and no recognition of their importance at all.

I doubt I'll know at the time the last time I nurse my daughter, and the last time she falls asleep all milk drunk in my arms. The last time she does that gasping, excited baby laugh when she sees her daddy or an animal will also likely not be noticed. The last time she gives up the fight and falls asleep spread eagled in her play room will likely be marked with amusement, but little else. Similarly the last diaper I change, though certainly worthy of celebration, will probably not be properly celebrated until the diaper itself is long gone. The last time she fits in my baby sling may be rejoiced by my aching back and shoulders, but not by my heart. The last time I have a let down at the sound of a baby crying will likely also only be looked back on with bittersweet memories, if I remember it at all. The last time she needs me to help her eat from a spoon, soothe her after a nightmare, answer yet another "why?" question, carry her to bed asleep, read her a bed time story, wash her hair for her, take a bath together, and so many, many other small and large steps towards independence will all only likely be recognized as the last time well after the fact.

So... thanks largely to the wonders of modern technology, I'm doing my best to document those important (and not so important) firsts. Those I can generally notice and keep track of, although I will admit, sometimes I can go a bit too far. Some of those "firsts" are only something a mother can truly love and appreciate.

Kat's First Solid Baby Turd. She's Going To Hate Me For This One.