Most of my friends who are going to have kids, already have at least one, but there are a few stragglers out there who might benefit from my unfettered addiction to buying books pertaining to whatever topic I happen to be currently passionate about, which right now is of course baby related. Oh, and baking, but that's another post. So, here are my Top 10 Baby Books that pretty much cover the range of everything you need to know (and then some) about what you've really gotten yourself into. Good luck!
If You Only Buy One Pregnancy/Baby Book: "Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn- the Complete Guide" by Penny Simkin, Janet Whalley and Ann Keppler. Very comprehensive and accessible book that's not full of fear mongering and tells you everything you need to know without needlessly freaking you out. Unlike "What to Expect When You're Expecting" which is condescending and full of info that will cause many pending Moms to lose much needed sleep and bombard their health care providers with panic-induced questions and phone calls. My friends who are OB/GYNs have asked me to ask you to not read that book. Or to take any advice from strangers on an on-line forum or phone app. Thank you.
If You Are Lazy and/or Buying a Baby Book for the Dad: "Baby 411" by Denise Fields and Ari Brown, M.D. This was given to us by my husband's cousin who is a new mom and an OB/GYN. Great quick reference guide, easy read, great question and answer format. Good guy book, only thing that would make it better is if it had cartoons and was scented with bacon.
If You Have Any Concerns About Your Relationship With Your Partner Post Baby: "And Baby Makes Three" by John M. Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman. A comprehensive strategy for making sure you stay connected with your partner and how to rekindle romance post baby arrival. I've worked with the Gottman's and have been a fan of their science-based approach to relationships and communication for years. There is a course offered by many hospitals called Bringing Baby Home based on this book. Also a valuable tool. They say 65% of couples experience serious decline in their marital happiness once the baby is born, this book will help you to be prepared in case that's you.
If You Have No Concerns About Your Relationship With Your Partner Post Baby: You should still read "And Baby Makes Three" because you never know and it's best to have these tools to use just in case. I feel we've been in the 35% of still happy couples (that's largely due to luck and having a baby who eats, sleeps, and poops without too much of a mess, screaming fit, or health problems), but the info in this book is still very helpful and has done a lot to keep us sane and happy and talking to each other without clenched jaws or wanting to chuck a dirty diaper at their head.
If You Have (or Need) a Sense of Humor About It All: "The Three-Martini Playdate- A Practial Guide to Happy Parenting" by Christie Mellor. While much should be taken very tongue-in-cheek, (such as "Our Little Tot's First Martini Recipe"), most of it is really a much needed rational breath of fresh air (such as "a child who has never been given chores to do is a child who grows up with a skewed sense of entitlement.). See also her follow up hit- "The Three-Martini Family Vacation: A Field Guide to Intrepid Parenting."
If You Are Already Placing Bottles of Purelle Around the House and Locks on Toilet Lids in Your First Trimester: "How to Have Your Second Child First- 100 Things That Are Good to Know... the First Time Around" by Kerry Colburn & Rob Sorensen. Sit down, have a glass of wine (Gasp! Yes, really, you can do it while pregnant), and read this book with your partner. It's hard to pick a favorite tip... from "you don't have to interact with your baby ALL of the time" to "let your partner do it their way" this book is full of good advice and good reminders for all parents, high strung and not. If you are already making spread sheets and think a baby helmet is a good idea for general around-the-house attire, you should be required by law to read this. For your child's well-being as well as your own and that of everyone around you.
If You Will Be Having a Baby, Ever, and Have Boobs: "Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding" by Ina May Gaskin. I actually haven't read this book, but it has been highly recommended by many friends who have struggled with issues with breastfeeding, I just went directly to a lactation consultant as I was too tired to read a book when I started having problems on day 11. I can't say enough good things about breastfeeding, even after dealing with "rug burned nipples" and latch problems, it's hands down the most special time I spend with my daughter. Oh, and just so you know, even if you don't breastfeed, the term "perky" will still never describe your boobs again without surgery. The good news is no one but you and your husband will know, and after not being allowed near them for awhile he won't care, he'll just be happy to have access again. Good excuse to buy that La Perla bra you've always wanted!
If You Are Not Obnoxiously Rich: "Baby Bargains" is for you. By the same people who do "Baby 411" (also "Expecting 411" and "Toddler 411"), I believe they have a guarantee to save you at least $250 or your money back. Full of very useful advice on what you really need, and what is just preying on new parents fears crap (hint: a wipe warmer is something every child can survive just fine without). Start with this book and by chucking the Baby's R Us "must have" registry list and you'll be good to go.
If You Won't be Having a Full Time Nanny: "Happiest Baby on the Block" by Dr. Harvey Karp. The "Five S's" on how to soothe a crying baby saved our sanity during the first few months. It's worth it just for that. There is also a DVD if you're all read out. Great for Dad to watch, will help him feel so much more empowered to deal with their tiny crying offspring. Men really like to be able to "fix" things, and this book/DVD helps them do that.
If You Have No Idea What to Do With Your Baby Aside From Singing Obnoxious Songs and Dressing Them in Cute Things: "Baby Smarts" by Jackie Silberg. A short little book with easy references to let you know what physical and cognitive skills your child is developing and what you can do to encourage them. It's really quite facinating to see how they figure stuff out when you know what to look for. Also helps you to be less anxious and frustrated with a cranky or crying baby when you know they're just working hard at figuring something out, and not colic or just being a general, undiagnosed pain in the ass.
BONUS: If You're a Science Nerd Like Me and/or Think It's Never to Early to Start Prepping for Harvard: "Brain Rules For Baby" by Dr. John Medina. It's a very interesting read on how a baby's brain develops and what their cognitive skills are like at each age. A good read, not too dry or scientific as to be inaccessible for weary parents to be. Amusing stories illustrate various developmental steps and keep it entertaining... my 92 year old Grandfather picked it up to read while he was visiting and enjoyed it when he wasn't watching Jeopardy.
